Sabbatical 4

NOTHING LESS THAN GOD CAN SATISFY US

I must confess that I hardly attended church while on sabbatical, until Kathleen and I started attending VEV again in late July. I also did not have my regular devotional times for a full month, something that had not occurred in my 40 plus years of following Jesus. Nevertheless, I felt it was in obedience to the Holy Spirit. I did journal each day and I meditated on various one-sentence sayings of Lady Julian of Norwich – a medieval mystic who served as the anchoress of a parish church in Norwich, England in the 13th century, who had received a download from heaven. My phrase for the first week of the sabbatical was, “Nothing less than God can satisfy us.”

In spite of this change in my devotional routine, my whole life felt like prayer – like I was having the Sabbatical with Jesus. I quickly discovered that “Sabbath” is not first of all, what you do (or don’t do), or where you go; rather, it is about who you are with. The tangible sense of having this sabbatical with Jesus gave me the true rest I was longing for (see Matthew 11:28-30). 

This rich sense of God’s presence that seemed so constant and without effort for me, more than made up for the frequent times over the past decade that I had felt so dry and had preached, prayed, loved, and served until my heart had felt completely wrung out. It comforted me for all those times I had studied, meditated, and wrestled in prayer over a sermon for 10-20 hours in a given week, only to preach my heart out to half the congregation on Sunday  – the other half deciding not to come that week! For a small congregation that is remarkably faithful in these distracting and stressful times, sometimes a lot of people went away at the same time! It sometimes felt that Jesus had decided not to come either!

As a pastor, this comes with the territory. I was struck that Jesus himself knew what it meant to feel that “he had labored in vain – to have spent his strength for nothing at all…” (see Isaiah 49:4a). I, along with anyone who leads, often feel this way, but this rich sense of Jesus being with me during the sabbatical gave me rest for my journey and nourished my soul with the encouragement and hope that, “… what is due me is in the Lord’s hand and my reward is with my God” (Isaiah 49:4b).

One of the few times Kathleen and I did go to church was on our first Sunday on sabbatical in Korea. After all, we were in Seoul, the site of the world’s largest church, Yoiddo Full Gospel Central. This church is part of the denomination I grew up in, and I remember hearing stories about it, even as a child. In an earlier blog article, I wrote about my first visit to this church with a group of friends in 1985. This time, I wanted to go again, and take Kathleen to experience it, as she was not with me on my first visit.

I was a little more discerning this time as the megachurches of Korea (and there are many) had not received a good review from our Korean homestay students. They felt that the sheer size, power, and money contained within these churches (many with over 100,000 attendees) had resulted in much corruption, including undue influence on governments and elections. At best, our homestays were more positive about Catholic churches and smaller Protestant congregations like ours. Many of our homestays attended and loved VEV when they were with us. Nevertheless, because Kathleen hadn’t seen Yoiddo, I felt it was important to take her at least once. There were seven services for us to choose from on that Sunday. There was seating for 25,000 (including overflow areas), with over 200,000 attending over the weekend in multiple services.

We opted for the 1pm service but after a hilarious misadventure of taking the wrong train (our “Angel,” Kyung Jin was leading worship at her own church, so she couldn’t rescue us this time), we arrived to Yoiddo Island quite late. The island, a business and political centre of Seoul, had a cherry blossom festival in “full bloom,” so it was very congested. Nevertheless, after walking along the Han River, and enjoying the sites and festivities, we arrived half-way through the service. We were quickly ushered in by friendly and helpful ushers into a balcony area and given translation headsets. To our amazement and delight, Yonggi Cho, the founding pastor, whom we knew to be retired, was preaching! I’d actually met him 30 years ago, but had never heard him preach live, so this was a real treat, both for me and Kathleen. I have attached a copy of his teaching notes below.

When I first visited Yoiddo Full Gospel Church in 1985, I was completely overwhelmed by the passion and intensity of the people’s prayer life. Prayer was constant and ongoing, during all the service times (any pause or break resulted in a loud eruption of prayer), before and after the services, during the week and early morning. Thousands were always fasting and praying 3 days at a time on Prayer Mountain, up close to the North Korean border and demilitarized zone. I’m sure there was still a lot of prayer this time, but I didn’t see it as much. Sure, after the service, a few sat and quietly prayed, but things had definitely changed. Why was this? Had power and prosperity reduced their sense of desperation and need for prayer that they had felt after the devastation and suffering of the Korean War?  Had they become just like us in North America, that is, if we don’t have God, there’s lots of other things to satisfy us now? I don’t want to be overly critical, because they still pray a lot more than we do. I was just struck by the contrast between 1985 and now, 2015.

Nevertheless, hearing Cho preach was very moving. He was lively and engaging. His gentle humour drew much laughter from the crowd of 25,000, and we were blessed to be able to see and hear him in person. For all his troubles, and he has had some, I still hold a high degree of respect for him. He still lives in a simple apartment and has chosen never to upgrade his lifestyle to opulence and excess, in spite of the remarkable numerical and financial growth of his church.

After this church service, we next journeyed by train directly across the Han River to the Jeoldusan Martyrs Shrine. “Jeoldusan” sounds quite melodic in English, but in Korean, it literally means “beheading mountain.” In the 19th century, thousands of Korean Catholics, the first Christian converts, were beheaded because of their Catholic faith which regarded all people as friends and equals, in defiance and rejection of the elitism and class hierarchy of the Choson societal system. The Yangban, the upper class elite who converted to Christ, worshipped and ate with peasants, slaves and commoners. This was so offensive to the prevailing culture, that they were brutally persecuted and killed in the hundreds at this very spot.

As I stood in that shrine, now a beautiful garden honoring these brave women and men, I thought: “This is who we are and what we are about!  This is the Good News that we proclaim, the Good News that Jesus died for, and what they died for.” There were so many of their names listed and you can read them at this site on Wikipedia.

As I stood on the edge of the cliff, over which their headless bodies were ruthlessly thrown, I noticed, to my wonder and amazement, that right across the river, clearly in view was a huge white cross! It was mounted on the main building of Yoiddo Full Gospel Church! As these martyrs died, despised and alone, did they have any idea that 200 years later, the very site where they died would be in viewing distance of the world’s largest Christian Church? More importantly, did they know how much their witness would inspire Korean Catholics to provide so much influence and leadership to movements of democracy and human rights in Korea since that time?

"The blood of the martyrs
is the seed of the church"
The world's largest church, within view
of "Beheading Hill," the martyrs shrine.

As I stood there, I felt I heard the Father’s encouraging whisper to me. “I did not forget the offering of these brave martyrs, nor was it in vain. See? And, in the same way, I have not forgotten your suffering, and offering of faith in obedience to Me, week after week, year after year, decade after decade. It’s a different kind of suffering – it is easier in some ways, in other ways it is harder, but I have not forgotten. Nor, have I forgotten the faithfulness of those in your church family, who, with so many distractions, continue to choose me as their highest joy, even when they see no obvious and immediate fruit, as with the Jeoldusan martyrs.

And, as if to underscore the point, we went for supper later that evening with Eunsoo one more time, one of our homestay daughters who I introduced you to in my last blog. This time, she introduced us to her boyfriend, Joon Ho. Again, it was just so delightful. This time, I refused to let them pay. They’re both students, for goodness’ sake. I wrote in my journal the next morning, “So, so precious. I love these wonderful young people and I want to give my life for them.”

Sabbatical 3

ACCOMPANIED BY AN ANGEL

VEV gave us the sweetest sabbatical sendoff a pastoral couple could ever want. There is no describing how much the love, the hugs, the words, the financial gifts that came at great cost from this remarkable little congregation that was already stretching so much to make the sabbatical happen, meant to us. Kirsten dropped by later with more gifts and words of wisdom. Scott generously gave up his Monday morning to drive us to the airport. So tender. We hugged Scott one more time, and we were off.

As I already mentioned, there was a degree of anxiety I had been feeling about choosing to start our badly needed sabbatical in a completely different land and culture with no tour guide. Kirsten’s word about “having fun” helped settle us, but still, we wondered, “Would it be restful?” For starters, we weren’t sure how we would get to our little guesthouse in Seoul’s Gangnam district, (made famous by Psy’s satirical K-pop hit, “Gangnam Style”). It was a long ways away and we had different transportation options at varying costs – such as, bus, train, or taxi. Almost inexplicably, we received a note a day or two before our departure from a young woman, KyungJin, who had come to VEV for five months in 2013. We had practically lost contact, but, I received a surprise email note from her stating she had heard we were coming and that she wanted to meet us at the airport. Sure enough, she was there!

Kathleen with our "Angel of Seoul," Kyung Jin. There is no
describing the uncanny timing and practical
assistance she provided us through our whole stay in Korea.
Simply supernatural. 

I can’t describe the emotional and spiritual “sigh of relief” I took when I saw her. She helped us get our transit cards and loaded them both with enough of her own money to cover our transit for much of the month in Korea. We hadn’t asked her to meet us. We hadn’t asked anyone to meet us at the airport – as it was a long ways away for our students, many of whom lived in other cities, and it would have been too costly in time and money to expect anyone to do so. Yet, there she was!

She helped us catch our much-preferred mode of transport to the Gangnam Guesthouse – a bus, by which we could see the sites and wonders of this new world we had entered. She helped settle us into our Korean guesthouse and took us out to one of the many classy Korean coffee shops. We soon began calling her, “the Angel of Seoul.” For the rest of the journey we received texts in the morning from her asking, “Did you sleep well?” How are you today?” “Is everything ok?” She sent us reminders and made countless detail arrangements for us like transport, hotels and car insurance. She rescued us when we were lost. Almost intuitively she would show up unannounced, but right on time in the busy markets of Seoul. She provided translation help, even by phone sometimes, when we were stuck. She leant us her cellphone, camera, selfie-stick, and was literally “on call” for us 24/7 for our whole time in Korea. She bought our DMZ/North Korean border tour. Her remarkable sacrifice for us served to make our trip, both a remarkable adventure and a superb rest. Over and over again, we were humbled by the generosity and thoughtfulness of this angel of God. And, to top it all off, when we were about to depart from Korea, she gave us a love package full of Korean tea and snacks for every member of VEV, including the kids!

First Journal Entry – the Third Day

Even though we had arrived in Seoul on Tuesday evening, April 7, my first journal entry wasn’t until Friday morning, the 10^th. Here’s a paraphrase of what I wrote:

“It’s been an unbelievable, incredible, indescribable first few days. Seoul is such a remarkable fusion of ancient and future, with gadgets so high tech, I am constantly asking for instructions on how to do something as basic as turn on the lights. Yet, to the backdrop of striking modern skyscrapers with architecture and design I have never seen in North America, there are temples, monasteries, and traditional “hanok” villages that showcase a way of life that stretches back thousands of years.

On our first day in Seoul, we toured the Gyeongbokgung Palace – which, for millennia, have housed royal families of the Choson dynasty. On the second day, we visited Namsan Mountain and Seoul Tower – watching soldiers in traditional Choson regalia put on a spectacular display of ribbon dancing, drama, and sword play with lots of action, humor and interaction with the audience. This included me being summoned out of the crowd to charge a bamboo pool with an ancient spear. After four lame attempts from previous volunteers, I was ready to show them how it was done! I took the spear and with a loud war cry, charged the bamboo pole to the great delight and roaring laughter of the huge crowd! Later that night, we took in the spectacular Nanta show, an Asian version of “Stomp,” complete with interactive singing, drumming, dancing, remarkable acrobatics, all the while, the actors were slicing and dicing food – yes, food was flying everywhere! What an artistic treat!

We felt immersed in a different world which provided a complete break for our minds, our spirits, and even our bodies. It was like God provided us with a general “spiritual anesthesia” through the sights, sounds, tastes, smells and sensations of a completely different land and people. Not surprisingly, as we had done with all our Korean homestay students whom we had hosted back in Canada, we quickly fell completely in love with this little country where they had come from – its land, its culture, its food, and most of all, its people. So beautiful. As Kirsten said, “Have fun,” and, oh, did we ever!

We Finally Meet Up With A Homestay Daughter!

With Eunsoo and her parents in the historic MyungDong
area of Seoul. An unforgettable evening together
with friends for life

On our third day, we finally met one of our delightful homestay daughters, Eunsoo, of whom I wrote on my last blog. We had a joyous reunion at Insa Station in Gangnam. We had so much fun together in Gangnam. She took us for lunch. She filmed us in our infamous impression of “Gangnam Style” street dancing, laughing hysterically while she did so. We visited the spectacular Gothic Catholic Cathedral in the Myong Dong district, and later, we finally had the joy of meeting her beautiful parents, who hosted us to an exotic meal in the heart of the Myong Dong market district. 

Oh the food, they kept bringing more and more! Oh the setting, indescribable! Yet, the most moving moment for us was meeting Eunsoo’s parents. Eunsoo’s mom became a follower of Jesus and started attending church around the same time that Eunsoo joined us here at VEV. Remarkable. She looked at us with tears in her eyes and said, “Why did you love our daughter so much?” She cried and they hugged us when it was time to say, “Goodbye,” and we have continued to stay in touch. Friends for life, and eternity.

In all of this, I heard Jesus saying to us, “Thank you for the seeds you have sown, for the love you have poured out.” I felt him pouring back into us, washing our feet, tending to our wounds incurred over years. He doesn’t forget.

Overwhelmed and at Rest

On our last day of our first week in Seoul, we rested in the morning, and in the afternoon, visited another famous market district called Insadong. We watched lots of passionate protests and marches – against nuclear weapons, and against North Korea’s oppression of religious and political prisoners.

Again, KyungJin, our amazing Angel of Seoul, was marvelous. What can we say? She again showed up in the middle of Insadong Market. She took us for tea at a Korean traditional teahouse five stories tall, where we looked out over the busy market below, while we savoured the flavours of Korean tea. We walked the Cheongyechong at night time – a human-made waterway through the city centre of Seoul. She then treated us to another delicious Korean dinner.

We had only been in Seoul for four days and I felt like the “not yet” had become “the already” and that time had mystically merged with eternity. KyungJin was such a huge part of that. Of course, she again refused to let us pay for anything that day. She accompanied us home in the cab and paid for our cab ride. Beautiful Angel of Seoul, messenger from God. He sent her to us as an instrument of his immeasurable grace, kindness, and generosity. We had no words – and we still don’t. We were, and are still, overwhelmed. We had entered deeply into the heart and spirit of what it means to be on sabbatical. We were at rest.  

Sabbatical 2

THE JOURNEY BEGINS, BUT FIRST…!

Our 5-month Sabbatical began with nearly a month in Korea. Why Korea? Well, that’s a story that goes back a ways. It was Easter, 1974. I was a teenager, living in the Peace Country of northern Alberta, and after a series of frustrating and painful events, I surrendered my life rather quietly to Christ. I tried to do so “under the radar,” so to speak. I didn’t want my parents to know, as I wanted the decision to be my own. I also wanted to make sure my commitment was for real. That very Easter, my dad took our family on a holiday to Vancouver, my first visit to the city. It was pretty exciting as before then, the biggest city I had ever been to was Edmonton. I was immediately captivated by the beauty, mystery, and wonder of Vancouver. For the next decade, I cherished any opportunity I had to visit. A few years later, Kathleen and I got engaged in Vancouver at the city centre!

After we were married, I accepted an invitation to be a youth and associate pastor at Calgary Christian Centre – a rapidly growing church in Calgary. Our youth group, after struggling for the first two years, grew from a handful in 1978, into the hundreds by the early 1980’s. The influx of teens and young adults resulted in the launch of a local church based discipleship training school, and a Bible College that graduated dozens of Christian leaders, pastors, and church planters. We garnered a lot of attention and I became increasingly in demand as a guest speaker across the country, particularly at youth related events.

KOREA, TAKE ONE

In 1985, I was asked to be part of a small delegation of youth pastors from across Canada and the US to visit the world’s largest church – Yoiddo Full Gospel Central Church in Seoul, Korea. At the time, the church claimed over 500,000 members.

During some sabbatical housecleaning, Kathleen found this photo from 1985,.
We're  with Yonggi Cho, pastor of the world's largest church.
Can you guess which one is me? Minus the tie, not much has changed, eh?

The father of one my friends on the tour was on the board of Yonggi Cho, the pastor of the church, whom I had the opportunity to meet briefly. Visiting Korea was one of the most remarkable experiences of my life. As I have shared many times, I was particularly impacted by the prayer life of the Korean Christians, to which they attributed their remarkable growth. I have relayed the story many times, but for decades, I never gave a thought to ever visiting Korea again. I felt like a “tourist” on my first visit and I couldn’t relate to the Korean culture nor to the sheer magnitude of the Korean church.

A SLIGHT DETOUR

Back in Calgary, I began to feel a deep restlessness to leave everything behind and start a new life in Vancouver. But, due to a lot of demands on me, both locally and abroad, and especially because of my inability to come to a resolution, my nervous system broke down. In 1988, I suffered a severe breakdown that left me incapacitated and there followed three years of “wilderness wanderings” which included Kelowna, Calgary, Zimbabwe, Lethbridge, and then two years with the house church movement in the UK.

Finally, in 1991, with virtually no earthly possessions besides our little K car, and a U-Haul full of mostly my books, we arrived in Vancouver’s Eastside, with our two children, Christian and Danielle, who were 11 and 8 at the time. We rented a little 2 bedroom apartment at 3^rd and McLean. We felt God say, “Just live in the city, and love people without an agenda.” I took a clerical job at UBC and worked there for 5 years. Gordie Guiboche, whom we knew from our Calgary days, was our first housemate, (along with Gizmo, our Vancouver cat!) We soon joined Joe and Charmaine Kelder and the Vancouver Vineyard, who welcomed and embraced us. In 1996 when Joe and Charmaine took a one-year sabbatical, we became lead pastors, and have been so since that time.

Through my tuition benefits at UBC, Kathleen, who was already a school teacher, was able to obtain her TESL (Teaching English as a Second Language). She began teaching international students and new Canadians through various agencies in the city. She soon became much in demand by Koreans to teach their youth English. Three years ago, we made connections with an agency from Korea that began to send university students for English language intensives with Kathleen while living in our home as homestays. Having these students in our home changed everything for me. They quickly became part of our family and worked their way deeply into our hearts. They would stay from one to three months. Every parting was heart-rending. This started in 2012 and by January of 2015, we had hosted nine different students. All were unique in their own right, and completely lovable, and enjoyable. We prepared and ate meals together. We went on at least one weekly outing or recreational event together. Most loved helping me do the weekly shop to the great amusement of the Safeway cashiers.

KOREA, TAKE TWO

Initially, when I had first visited Korea in the 1980’s, all I had seen was the passionate church culture of the Korean Christians. I had little engagement with the Korean culture outside of the church. Yet, in spite of the massive mega-churches in Seoul, most of Korea is still not Christian. Right in our own home, we got the opportunity to experience this whole other side of Korea that I had missed when I had visited there the first time. Most of the students who came into our home were not Christians and some were actually quite hostile to religion, having experienced what they called the “aggressive” tactics of Christians back in Korea. Others were quite put-off by the perceived corruption of the megachurches due to their size and influence.

One student, Eunsoo, initially refused to come to our home when she found out I was a pastor. The agency encouraged her to reconsider based on our good references, and later, she told us that when she viewed our profile and picture, she felt “something warm” come over her, so she decided to give it a go. She felt that same feeling when she walked into our home, and when she first walked into our church! We’re so glad she came as we are now friends forever. She had a remarkable encounter with God while she was with us, but, we always left it up to the students as to whether they would come to church or not. Some did, and some didn’t. We loved them all the same, of course.

Kathleen with one of our homestay daughters, HyunJin,
affectionately as "Jini" to many at VEV.
Do you think she loves Kathleen?

Those who did come to church became a beloved part of our community. VEV has been so wonderful in welcoming people like Eunsoo, HanKyeol, HyunJin, and SoHee, who last year went with us to Lower Post and was such a delightful addition to our Mission to the Kaska Dene First Nations – a dream come true for us! Koreans have a remarkable connection with First Nations – partly due to sharing similar stories of having to overcome colonization and oppression.

Another significant person in our remarkable Korean adventure was a young woman named Kyung Jin who showed up at our church in 2013. Kyung Jin was referred to the Vineyard by her spiritual director in Seoul, and she quickly became a part of our church and joined our worship team for four or five months. She then returned to Seoul and we lost touch for some time, but later, she became the “angel of Seoul” for us on our sabbatical in Korea.

Through all of these amazing encounters, I began to feel a deep desire to return to Korea again after 30 years. Kathleen had previously asked me to consider going to Korea several times, and, at first, I had no desire at all, but our homestays changed everything. I wanted to visit again – but this time, not as a tourist, but as a friend, who had grown to deeply love these Korean people. As the time for our sabbatical approached, it became apparent that this was how we wanted to begin our sabbatical - by going on an adventure to a completely different land, culture, and people – a people we had so completely fallen in love with. For Kathleen and me, Korea was where our vocational worlds came together wonderfully. Through airmiles, we booked our tickets in January 2015. We found out our flights took us through Beijing, China, so we planned to stay there for a few days on the way home. During the fall and winter of 2014/2015, I learned the Korean (Hangul) alphabet and took language lessons. I did an intensive study of Korean history – from the ancient Chosun Dynasty to the present time. By the time our sabbatical had come, we could hardly wait to get on the plane. All of our homestays could hardly believe we were coming when they first got word.

I must confess, that while we were excited, we were also scared. We had never done anything like this before. We’d always had a tour bus or agency, or some kind of host to receive us for international cross-cultural travel. This time, we read lots of “Lonely Planet” books, and made all our own arrangements for guesthouses. We did get some help from our Korean friends for various aspects of our trip, but not as a whole package. What would we eat? Would the Koreans understand English? Would my limited Korean be enough? How would we get around the country, as our homestays lived in various parts of Korea? In all honesty, we began to have misgivings about whether this was the best way to start a sabbatical. The potential for stress seemed really high.

However, on Easter Sunday, April 5, 2015, we were given such a remarkable sendoff by our church family. During that service, we were prayed over and Kirsten, one of our elders, gave us the prophetic word, “Have Fun!” There was something releasing about that word that seemed to clear away any residual anxiety, and on Monday, April 6, we embarked on our long flight for Seoul, not sure what would be waiting for us on the other side, but excited and much more at peace that a wonderful adventure truly awaited us.

NEXT WEEK – SEOUL ADVENTURE